Checking in.

Hey. It’s been a while. Umm week, week and a half maybe. I uh just wanted to stop in on the blog and apologize for not keeping our couple of followers in the loop with what all is going on. Umm, I’ve been busy, been reading blogs and catching videos but I’ve mainly refocused my attention on my work for the school.

My advisor-type person called me up a week back and basically let me know that the school was trying to get rid of me. Said they were concerned with my productivity and my increasingly odd behavior (things like bringing in my personal board games to try to keep kids off the playground, uh my jumpiness and generally antisocial behavior). I calmly explained to him that between the whole thing with the missing girl and some ridiculous fictional family issues that I was having trouble concentrating and well just really not sleeping, that it was a wonder I could even get up in the mornings. I told him that I was aware of these issues though and had taken steps to correct it all. Said that I’d gone to see a doctor and gotten myself proscribed some sleeping and anti-anxiety medications and that I should according to my doctor be operating at a manageable level again in the coming weeks. Then I went in and told the same thing to the school administrators who in all likelihood were trying to boot my crazy ass out of their establishment and let them know that I’d be making up all the work I’d slacked off on during my uh… episodes. 

Now all of this is lies, well I mean what I told them was lies, but I did get my parents to send up a couple mostly full bottles of Focilin from back in Middle and High School when they had me on and off ADD medications all the time. I’ve started taking them daily despite my severe dislike of medications, they’ve um… enabled me to sit down and focus on things that are far less important than this impending danger, to obsess over trivial things really and its done wonders for my paranoia. I mean I still know it’s out there, the Slenderman thing, and it still frightens me but these feelings really only start to come up when I’m not occupied with something. Luckily I’ve got so much fucking work to catch up on from all those weeks where my mind was out in the woods rather than in the classroom that I should be able to stay busy for some time. 

As for the actual, you know… I’ve decided that I’m pretty blessed. This thing seems content just watching me for now, and from what I’ve read, well I’m pretty lucky if that’s all its doing. If it wants to sit outside and follow me around as I go from the apartment to school, back to the apartment, and occasionally to the store to pick up something edible since Henry’s started stocking the place with all this weird vegan shit now… well that’s perfectly fine. Let it. I’ll know when it’s there; I’ve got music playing all the time now. I’ve had to remove a few bands I like from my playlists, Ordo Rosarius, Sopor Aeternus , Emile Autumn, but it’s a price worth paying to avoid false feedback. It comes and goes but it never seems to act, and for that I’m really blessed. 

~Kal 

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You know what's Terrible?

Its terrible when you wake up 5 minutes before your alarm clock goes off and you sit there in a daze before it starts blaring in your ear. In commemoration of this most horrid event I'm going to shower and dress for work, but before we do that I think I'll let you all act as an excuse to cower in my warm bed a while longer before going out into the hallway to face the cruel elements of apartment life. Aferwards I may hunt down and devour a box of wild cheerios before starting the long hard migration to the fabled land of Skool.

So, in recognition of this event I give you all...
Drum roll please
... a Vox 93 style music dump. Primarily of the songs that make my little mornings of hell a tad less hellish.

Starting off the list is Temple of Love, a lyrically beautiful song from The Sisters of Mercy, and a pretty rocking one at that... but everyone loves Temple of Love much like everybody loves Black Planet (except me, Black Planet isn't bad, there are just so many songs that I prefer to it), so let's go and get some more Mercy on.

Directly above is my favorite, and what I believe to be Damien's favorite Sisters song respectively, though I'm not going to wake him at this awful hour to check on it. And with that we move on to the next band...

London After Midnight

London after Midnight is obviously rather political minded, and while I can't always share it their opinions I can certainly enjoy their music.

Next up we have the very talented Emilie Autumn

Her work exhibits a particular darkness that I find incredibly attractive, a sort of tortured sound of someone who's been broken but carries on anyhow... I'm not really sure how to articulate what it is I like about her music, a venom or bitterness perhaps, but there is one thing I can say for certain...

...Some of it makes me extremely thankful for my Y chromosome.

Slowly rising on my list of favorite bands (slowly due to my own lack of exploration ) is Christian Death

If familiar you'll notice these are all Valor Kand pieces, this is because I haven't given Rozz a proper listen yet, though I must say I'm really liking what I've head of Valor.

Next up, deviating from everything that's come before we've got some Tom Waits

And finally the single song that got me started on music in the first place - The Mission UK's Amelia

It should be mentioned that I sing these songs along with my iPod... loudly... and terribly... and considering the lyrical content of some of them (read: nearly all of them) I get some pretty strange looks. My singing is a voice box weaponized.

TGIF

~Kal

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Student Teaching

Alright, well I'm sure you're all wondering about my first week as a teacher... what? You aren't? You come here for Henry's short stories and poetry? Ehh, screw you, I'm typing it up anyhow.

Good God do I not like waking up at 6AM, it's just a generally unpleasant thing to do. I certainly did pick a strange occupation for myself with that in mind. Anyway, while I know I've stated this a half billion times now, I have to wake up at 6AM tomorrow and every day even though the school doesn't open until 9. I have to do this because I do not have a car, instead I get to hike and ride some 50 miles from home to get to the school house. It takes me about 40 minutes to dress and shower and gather up all my crap, then I trudge off into the snow towards Forest Ridge Elementary School, well I did Tuesday anyhow. We haven't been getting all that much snow around here surprisingly. It is cold though, and that sucks; cold weather means a couple things for me. It means that A) I cannot wear my favorite coat and have to settle instead for my less attractive but warmer one. And B) that the portions of my journey between bus stops are agonizing 20 minute stretches of cold and I end up nose dripping when I make it to the school, which really is a pretty unprofessional way to arrive. All in all though it's a pretty enjoyable journey, I get to spend about an hour and 45 minutes every morning listening to The Sisters of Mercy, London After Midnight, E.S. Posthumus, Christian Death and various other musicians on the way to work. (I call it work because I'm a far better employee than student and I don't want to screw this up, hopefully adopting that mindset will keep me on task.)

As for my actual day at the school, well for now I spend most of it at a desk at the back of Mrs. Veglahn's 3rd grade class nursing my mango energy drink to keep awake and observing the way she teaches the class and handles the problems that her students occasionally stir up. When the kids go off to gym class, the library, lunch, or any of their other midday activities Terra (that's Mrs. Veglahn) runs me through writing up and carrying out lesson plans which is apparently a rather large part of course. Later on I'll be writing up and carrying out my own lesson plans with these 30 or so kids as guinea pigs, but that's still about a month or so off.

At recess I'm sent outside to watch over the kids... I suspect because it's cold outside and being student teacher means that on top of learning the trade I also get to perform grunt work. I don't really mind though, besides the nipping wind the worst I've had to deal with so far was a kid from another class trying to climb the little chain fence that marks the end of the blacktop to retrieve a stray kickball. Past the fence is a paved road leading back to the staff parking lot, and then thick woods with a small ditch in front of it, for obvious reasons the kids have to stay within the fenced area.

After Recess I go back in and sit in the back of the classroom again, have a chat with Mrs. Veglahn about the day, ride the bus home, and then promptly pass the hell out. Speaking of passing out... I've got work tomorrow, I should really be getting to sleep. Work in the morning.

Constantly awoken by a cascading alarms

~Kal

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Science! Wait no... Magic!

To our likely nonexistent viewers, should you really truly exist, head over to my buddy Damien's blog for posts with actual content. He writes about magic and music and all sorts of interesting stuff that you won't find over here, anyhow yeah, give him a look at Vox 93. It'll be fun, you know you want to.
~ Kal

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